18 and Counting: On Changing and Drifting

August 3, 2012 § 2 Comments

Graduation is so very bittersweet.

The ‘sweet’ part consists of the partying, the turning 18, prom (or in our case, the graduation banquet). Knowing that some of my best memories will be the memories I have of high school makes me so happy I could cry. I will always remember dressing up in neon and being a crowd pumper at WE DAY. Being a band nerd and performing concerts with the most amazing musicians is something that will stay with me the rest of my life. I will never forget getting my hair done with my best friend and dolling myself up and feeling absolutely beautiful for the grad banquet. Walking across the stage and, unexpectedly, receiving my diploma and a scholarship will forever be embedded in my memory. And the cap that hangs in my room is a sweet reminder of all the good times I had.

Now, it’s all over and done with. We are all in the middle of the transition from high school to university, from adolescence to adulthood. Little by little, my closest friends and I are drifting apart, each of us changing within the span of only two months. It’s the best time of my life, but it’s also the most difficult. Being the kind of person who tends to take myself seriously, I don’t have the penchant to go out clubbing or fool around in bars. Yes, it is enjoyable, but I have other ways to occupy my time. And as summertime stretches along, I find myself feeling lonely. At some point, I even started thinking I have no friends at all because I’m just finding it harder and harder to relate to them. It’s not that I don’t like these people anymore. It’s just that I’ve changed. A lot.

This is, without a doubt, the bitter part of graduation.

I find myself thinking about how I can keep my friends nowadays.

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